


BabyKam

by Insanelorraine



Series: Lab Accidents [1]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angry Kamski, Crack, De-aging, Fluff, M/M, Shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-01
Updated: 2020-03-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:57:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22979476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Insanelorraine/pseuds/Insanelorraine
Summary: Kamski had a bit of an accident in his lab.Connor told him he should be careful.Kamski told him that he wasn't in any danger.Well, he's not in danger....But he's a baby now.And he has shit to do.(Please, I'm so bad at summaries. This is very funny and fluffy and I promise you'll like it!)
Relationships: Connor/Elijah Kamski
Series: Lab Accidents [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1652638
Comments: 12
Kudos: 35





	BabyKam

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pukner](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pukner/gifts).



> Hello (Readers? Friends? Fans? FAM?!) This came about when fellow writer Pukner and I were chatting at ass AM. Pukner gave me this lovely idea and I told him I'd make it real.
> 
> So here I am. 
> 
> Making it real.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!

Elijah Kamski has made few mistakes in his life.

This is…

This is one of them.

How this happened is a little blurry. He remembers doing research on cell regrowth and regeneration. He remembers starting an experiment.

Clearly he’d made a crucial mistake.

Every other test he’d run had yielded varying results. But none of them lasted more than 24 hours before the effects wore off.

So he’s got about 23 hours left until everything goes back to normal. He has a meeting at CyberLife today with Markus and his crew. Connor would be attending with him. He usually did, since Kamski offered him a place to stay after the revolution. But there’s just a small problem.

Connor is cooing at him and is clearly distracted.

It’s like he’s never seen a baby before, sheesh.

“Get it together Connor. I have a meeting later! I need you focused!” Elijah snaps his fingers in front of Connor’s face.

“I’m sorry! You’re just so CUTE!” Connor says, picking him up. Elijah is dressed in a baby sized suit that Connor just got back from buying.

“I’m not cute! I’m an adult MAN, Connor. This is only temporary! Put me the hell down!” Elijah yells. He tries to wiggle free from Connor’s grasp, to no avail. Connor maneuvers Elijah in his arms so he’s cradled tightly against him. Elijah pounds his tiny fists against Connor’s chest but Connor doesn’t even seem to notice.

“Does this mean I can say ‘I told you so?’” Connor asks, rocking him in his arms. Elijah glares up at him, But Connor’s eyes practically have hearts in them.

“When this is over, I’m going to disasemble you. Piece, by fucking piece. I’ll make sure you’re awake too!” Elijah says, trying to make his voice sound as deep as he can. It just makes him sound like a child acting grown up. His threats fall flat.

Connor only hums in response.

Elijah hates not being taken seriously. At least at the meeting everyone HAS to listen to him.

~

“Connor! You were right! He’s so cute!”

Chloe started working for CyberLife as a receptionist after Elijah took over the company. He’d been grateful to have a familiar and calming presence at the office.

Now? 

He regrets ever creating androids in the first place.

“Don’t you start with me, Chloe! I had enough trouble getting Connor to stop fawning over me to get us here!” Elijah snaps. He toddles over to the reception desk and climbs onto it so they can be closer to eye level.

She snatches Elijah off the desk and places him in her lap. He squirms to get free but can’t escape her vice grip.

“Look at you! You’re adorable! You don’t even look this cute when you sleep! You should stay like this. Maybe people will like you more.” Chloe says, running her fingers through his hair. His hair is still long, but not as long as it was before this happened. He reaches up and bats her hand away.

“Maybe I don’t need people to like me to validate my existence!” He snaps, clambering off her lap. 

“Yet you claim all the attention in a room whenever you enter.” She says.

“I do not!” 

“You really do.”

“I can’t help it if people find me utterly captivating!” Elijah scoffs, crossing his arms. Chloe giggles and he realizes how comical he looks. Like a pouting child. He sighs and uncrosses his arms. “Is Jericho here?”

“They are already in the meeting room. I can’t wait to hear how this goes.” She says.

Elijah turns toward the elevator across the room. It seems so much farther way when he’s so small. But he’s determined to walk by himself. He’s an adult, goddammit. This is just a… minor setback.

Connor reaches down to pick him up but Elijah swats at him.

“Get your hands off me! I am an adult! I know how to walk!” He snaps.

“Well if you need help, I’m more than willing to carry you.” Connor says, a gentle smile on his face.

Elijah wants to slap it off of him, but he knows he won’t do any damage.

~

By the time they got to the elevator, Elijah’s tiny legs were so tired. Connor could tell. So he proceeded to pick him up against his will, as the elevator doors opened to their floor, and carry him down the hall to the meeting room.

Markus is a serious person. So are the others. North… is scary. At least he’ll get some respect in here.

“Uh… Connor? Who’s baby is that? And where’s Kamski?” Markus asks, one eyebrow raised in confusion.

“Elijah did something stupid that I told him he shouldn’t and now he’s facing the consequences of his actions.” Connor answers, lifting Elijah up and down for emphasis.

Everyone stares. Silent. Wide eyed. Open mouthed.

Staring. 

Elijah always hated being stared at. It makes him overly aware of everything about himself.

“Have none of you EVER seen a baby before? It’s just a human being that’s SMALL! Put me the hell down so we can get started!” Elijah snaps. Connor walks over to the chair at the head of the table and places him in it.

This is a problem.

He can’t… see over the table.

There’s snickering all around the room. 

Connor walks out of the room, returning only a few moments later with a large stack of books from Elijah’s office. Reluctantly, Elijah slides off the chair. Connor places the books down on the chair before picking Elijah up and placing him on top of them.

Elijah KNOWS his face is red.

He clears his throat and begins the meeting. He explains his ideas for expansion to other countries, Markus being an ambassador of peace and android tolerance, and discusses the decline in crimes against androids but increase in homeless androids.

He stops when he realizes no one’s interrupted him for once. No one’s chimed in with any additional information or anything off topic.

He looks around at the androids in the room. Connor is still looking at him like he’s a tiny, cute angel. North just looks confused. Josh looks like he doesn’t want to be here. Simon looks like he’s seen the cutest thing in the entire world. Even Markus looks like he wants to pinch his cheeks or something.

“Could you all please FOCUS?! This is temporary! Why is this meeting ANY different from our previous meetings?” Elijah snaps, glaring at everyone. 

“Well, I’ve never been in a meeting led by a baby.” North says.

“I’m not a baby!” Elijah yells, his voice high and childish.

“Maybe not normally, Mr. Kamski… But you are right now. So it’s a little hard to take you seriously.” Markus offers, with an apologetic look.

“I cannot believe you guys! I thought you of all people would be the ones to take me seriously! I’m gonna kick all of your asses, one by one, as soon as this shit wears off.” Elijah says, crossing his arms. He’s fully embracing the pout now. No point in denying it.

“I’ve never punched a child before but now’s as good a time as any!” North says, slamming her hands on the table as she stands. Josh immediately grabs her and pulls her back.

“No one’s punching anyone! He’s lashing out because he’s stressed!” Markus says. Josh quietly calms North back into her seat.

“How could you actually want to punch him, North? He’s soooo cute! I just wanna hold him!” Simon coos.

“If anyone touches me, everyone in this room gets deactivated. Connor first.” Elijah says. Connor chuckles and smiles at him. 

Again with the heart eyes.

~

Elijah has been bored since they got home. He’s never been interested in television shows, the news pisses him off, and he can’t even reach his desk!

But at least at home it’s only Connor who will see him like this.

At least, that’s how it’s SUPPOSED to be.

“Oh my God! You absolute fucking idiot! See what happens when you don’t check your ego? You end up like this!”

Of course Gavin Reed is here!

His beloved half- brother.

“Connor, why did you let him in?!” Elijah calls out. He doesn’t receive an answer.

“He didn’t just let me in. He called me here, dipshit.” Gavin says.

“Go away! I don’t need your shit right now!” Elijah snaps.

“Feels weird being cussed at by a baby.” Gavin says, smirking at him.

“I’M NOT A FUCKING BABY!” Elijah practically screams.

“Awww, are you gonna throw a tantrum?” Gavin teases.

Elijah feels like he’s going to explode. He doesn’t get angry often. But this is definitely the angriest he’s ever felt.

But he’s in the body of a baby. He can’t punch him. He can’t just leave and avoid the altercation. So he does what anyone in his situation does.

He screams. 

His voice is high and shrill because of his current body. What does anyone do when a baby screams at the top of their lungs right in front of them?

They cover their ears and back off.

Connor rushes in and picks up him, shushing him quietly.

“I told you not to piss him off!” Connor says.

“I didn’t do shit!” Gavin says, feigning innocence.

Good thing Connor is smarter than that.

“I called you here because I thought you’d care! Not bully him.” Connor snaps.

“How could I not poke fun a little!? Look at him!” Gavin says, gesturing to Elijah who glares at him.

“I have looked at him. He’s adorable and innocent!” 

“Innocent?! He’s an egotistical bastard getting what he finally deserves!”

“Your brother is in the middle of an extremely stressful time! How could you be so horrible!”

“Why do you care so much?! He basically made you a glorified assistant! What an upgrade! From plastic rent- a- cop to assistant to a spoiled brat!”

“Because I care about him! And he cares about me!”

“Damn. Manipulated you into believing that, huh? The rish bastard doesn’t care about anyone or anyTHING but himself!” Gavin says, shaking his head. Elijah is sure he’s going to scream again if Gavin says another word.

“Get out then! You clearly don’t care about him. So you shouldn’t have come! I regret calling you. I was greatly mistaken about your character. Leave. Now!” Connor snaps, voice full of venom.

Elijah’s never heard Connor get so angry.

And they argue all the time.

~

“I have to say, yesterday was a disaster of a day.” Elijah says, tying his robe around his waist as he leaves the bathroom from showering.

“It was definitely out of the ordinary. Though I’ve come to expect that from you.” Conor says.

“Don’t think I’ve forgotten how you were cooing over me.” Elijah says with an accusational point of his finger.

“Of course not, Elijah.” Connor says, smiling.

“I enjoyed watching you stand up to Gavin. I only regret that I couldn’t deck him in your honor.” 

“My honor? Why mine and not yours?”

“I’ve heard worse about myself. Between growing up with him and dealing with the media trying to tear me down. But he insulted you,acted like you’re an object instead of a person. I wanted to punch his stupid face.” Elijah says bitterly. Connor just looks at him for a moment. Something entirely unreadable in his eyes. He walks until he’s inches from Elijah, who is unfazed by Connor doing strange things.

But then he kisses him. 

It’s the smallest brush of his lips against Elijah’s.

But it happened.

“I care so much about you, Elijah. You were so cute as a baby.” Connor says, reaching down and gently taking Elijah’s hands in his. “But I think you’re much cuter like this.”

Elijah’s face heats up and he can’t even figure out what to say, feeling so many emotions at once. One feeling in particular he knows all too well.

He feels like a kid with a crush all over again.


End file.
